Looking At Myself
Looking at myself in photographs or in the mirror sometimes forces me to reflect about the person I’ve become at this point in time.
For me, this is me doing my best to get by.
…to take it one day at a time,
…to not have to feel like I must explain myself every step of the way,
…that my life doesn’t have to make sense to everybody else that have no stake in it,
…to be okay with not having it all figured out.
…to relax in who I am… and all that I am not.
…and not have to play out or play small because that’s what I think other people need or want from me.
…to know that my worth is not incumbent on what my (life) looks (are) like on the outside.
…that I’m not just my job, my achievements, or what I do.
…that I can give my love without waiting for the world or others to meet my conditions:
‘when I have more money, then…’, ‘when I get this, then….’, and all sorts of excuses to withhold myself. There’s always something to give: Understanding, space, tolerance, care…
…to remind myself and others that one person’s light or talent or beauty or blessings never ever take away from ours….
…and that we aren’t just the guys from work, or the servers at th,e coffee shop, your boss, the cab driver or the girl who just seems to breeze though life.
We are all going through our own battles, whatever they may be. Compassion is a lot more work than writing everyone off (and often times rolling your eyes is a far easier response to people and things that irk us). But life’s hard enough without us having to make it harder for everyone else (and ourselves).
Love, love, love! Life is short.